paolo berdin

yo yo yo
3.30.2008

i think i've become fat because of bad karma.

i used to be disgusted at stretch marks, but now i have them on my hips, arms, and legs.

anyway, i had a sign made for my door:

i wanted something like "do not enter" below my name, but that would read "paolo do no enter". i haven't hung it yet, though, because i'm thinking of painting my door another color. i was thinking of green, but my room's red so that would make it too christmassy. yellow, perhaps?

9:27 PM
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there, i've said it.
3.29.2008

in light of recent events, i think i should review what i've done and what other people have done to me. reflect about who my real friends are, and who aren't. i feel that there is a need for me to prioritize my friends, which is something other people find so difficult hard to do.. probably because they get carried away by the spur of the moment, or i don't know. but no matter how exciting the moment can get, you never forget those who matter. or maybe i just don't have the same ideals as, ermmmm, some people?

i've wanted to write about this for quite some time, and now i am, but the write words aren't materializing. i feel like i have so much to say that i don't know how to state them all. they're mixed up and jumbled and i'm having a difficult time putting them in place. but what i'm trying to say is that i am hurt at how selfish people can be, and what hurts more is the feeling of being used.

i hate admitting feeling hurt and sad and all that, but there, i've said it.

i don't know what else to talk about but i feel the need to make a new entry just for the sake of it, and i don't want this entry to be too dramatic since i'm really not the type, so i am going to give you a recap of my not-so-interesting week hahaha:

TUESDAY - afternoon was spent the whole afternoon in ayala with a few friends, something i haven't done in the longest time - the ayala part, i mean. you know, the usual mall stuff teens-obsessed-with-chuck-taylors-and-friendster do? hahaha.

WEDNESDAY - was the first time i felt someone was angry with me. like angry-furious-wild-calling-other-people-to-tell-how-i-really-am-blah-blah sort of angry. apparently, someone thinks that i am very good at brainwashing people and charming them to side and sympathize with me.. but i will refuse to add more since things are already okay (i think) HAHA. i hate drama, and i hate being part of it more. anyway anyway, that night i got drunk and on..

THURSDAY - morning, with a terrible hangover, i went down to the dining room to eat but i threw up instead. since my stomach was empty, i puked blood! i know, i know, it's disgusting. but that wasn't the first time it happened to me. i should probably get my stomach checked, yeah?

FRIDAY - went to school to be oriented for summer duty. thank god our c.i. was my brother's classmate in college.

SATURDAY - isn't over yet, but i don't see any prospects of it getting any better than yesterday.

5:30 PM
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save me!
3.25.2008

i'm bored.

i think i might buy notebooks for school later, just to amuse myself.

i want to go to the beach and never have to come back for school and hospital duty!

12:30 PM
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adriana
3.24.2008

adriana lima in this month's GQ is the definition of HOT!!!

11:07 AM
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bantayan ebab
3.21.2008

i just got home from bantayan, which explains the blog entry drought. i have the worst case of sunburn, but i love being all red sunkissed... just as much as i love that island! i saw this new house right beside the resort we stayed in (the one with the cave.. ogtong?) and i am building something like it when i get filthy rich! that's one of the things i have to do before i die, have a house by the beach. then i'll ride elephants in thailand, spend a summer biking around france, go to greece and maldives and egypt and everywhere else! hahahahahahahaha.

anyway im uploading my bantayan pictures really soon. tomorrow, maybe. or the day after.

oh and after colon last monday, raisa and i went to ayala because i had to buy a new grip for my tennis racket ,and there was this couple by the counter who called each other "EBAB". now i've heard of b and hon, and even babes. but EBAB?! seriously! that's a whole new level. a whole new level of baduyness!

7:56 PM
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david's birthday
3.17.2008

i ended my stay-at-home-on-weekends phase last saturday. it was david lim's birthday party at the maria luisa clubhouse. it was tons of fun yet.. hmmmmmm.. say, "shocking" - because the people i'd least expect to get drunk and dance wild and throw up did. hahahahahaha. thank god i didn't, even after endless glasses of vodka with sprite, vodka with tonic water, vodka with coke, vodka with light coke, and whatever else i could mix vodka with.

but what happened after the party was nothing short of tragic. my car broke down when i was about to go home! after countless wrong turns and a million dead ends, my car gave up and just wouldn't refuse to run. and where did this all happen? in paseo elizabeth which is in phase 6!!!!!!!! but if it's any consolation, my car broke down in front of my dream house (this square mexican-inspired one) hahahahaha. and plus it was raining. and the signal wasn't good. and it was dark. and scary. but rejoice rejoice - i'm still alive.

saviors of the night: david and katsua's boyfriend jao. hahahaha. i should write a tribute to them, but i should keep this short. i'm exploring downtown cebu today!

8:06 AM
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100
3.14.2008

yehey i've reached the 100 mark!

you might think that it's not THAT big of a deal, but whatever.

i installed the counted on the 11th of this month, by the way, lest you think that i've had a hundred views since last year. hahahaha.

8:46 PM
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white wayfarers and carly smithson.
3.13.2008

i got the most humiliating scores in our final exam. but i don't really care, to be honest, considering how i never even opened my notebook study. i tried reading my textbook but didn't because i was too lazy, opting to blog instead. HAHA. i've always considered myself to be, say, smarter than the average person (now you can crucify me for saying that). i admit that i sometimes don't think that i have to study,but i can't just assure myself every single time i get a low score that i'm smart because of some IQ exam i took in high school. i need to change no matter how much i tell myself that i don't care.

on a brighter note, i got these in the mail today:

i can hardly see when i put them on. but i'm still really really really happy with them!

i hope carly smithson wins season 7 of american idol. i'm no music critic but i think that she is AMAZING! here's a video of her singing "come together" originally by the beatles:

4:10 PM
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i'm back. for the nth time.
3.11.2008

WOW I"M ACTUALLY BLOGGING AGAIN!

hello loyal readers - wait, i'm not sure someone actually bothers to check my blog anymore considering how i haven't posted anything since january. the only person who's adding to my hits is me. hahaha isn't that the saddest thing?

but now that you're reading this, though, you MUST be wondering what i've been up to since my last entry and i will happily address all your thoughts!

first of all, i have discovered the joy of buying things online. i have a package arriving tomorrow and another one on thursday afternoon and i haven't been this thrilled since.. ummmmm.. well, since the last time i felt thrilled. hahaha. i wish cebu had more interesting stores, though. i can NEVER find anything interesting here. or maybe i just don't look hard enough?

second, i think i've gained 37254 pounds. the last time i weighed myself was in late 2006, i think, for our nutrition class and i was 160. in march of 2006, i was 130. if my weight gain has been constant and if my computations are correct, i must be over 200 pounds by now! but no no no i think 200 is too much. i'm probably 195. HAHAHAHA. hmmm that's still too much. okay, i'm probably 175. ugh. plus summer's just a few days away so how do you expect me to go to the beach with this fat suit i'm in?

speaking of summer, i'm going to spend 3 weeks of my vacation doing hospital duty. i hate hospital duty. so far, i've already spent a total of 5 days doing it and every time i get home i contemplate killing myself. haha. one time, i contracted a fever from my 1 year old patient (which is called a nosocomial infection, by the way, since i got it from the hospital) and i wish i had never taken up nursing in the first place.

OH and the worst thing happened in january! we had our return demonstration for this procedure called enema and a classmate performed it on me. i swear it was the most disgusting thing i've ever gone through, and one of the most painful. so painful, in fact, that i screamed FUCK in front of our clinical instructor. for those of you who don't know what enema is, THIS is how it looks like.

ANYWAY our final exam is on this thursday and i should really be studying, so i'm ending here. and make sure to check my blog more often because i'm back yo! hahahahaha

3:06 PM
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